I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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