Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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