Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
