how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
