That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I wish they made helmets for livers.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize