Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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