R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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