you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
