His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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