I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
