hell yes lets make some ravioli
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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