i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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