wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
We have started to decorate penises.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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