I hate all girls vehemently.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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