ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize