The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Everything about him screamed your future.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
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