SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
