who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I skipped work to stalk him.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
