2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize