One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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