Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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