I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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