She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
