Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
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