no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
