Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
