You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i just had sex bonerless
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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