I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
