You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize