Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
