I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
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