we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
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