You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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