plz talk dirty to me
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize