her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
