Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
