Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
