Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
