but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
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