well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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