Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
