your thong is hanging out like whoa
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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