just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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