I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
