Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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