In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize