It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
