help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I AM VODKA MAN
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
