they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
