my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
