when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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